Matt Trombley: The beauty and complexity of finding common ground

The beauty and complexity of finding common ground

How can we disagree with one another, respectfully and productively? In this thoughtful talk, team builder Matt Trombley reflects on "agonism" -- the tendency to take a rigid stance on issues -- and shares why finding aspects of agreement can be the first step in resolving conflict. "When you can find even the smallest bit of common ground with somebody, it allows you to understand the beautiful wonder and complexity and majesty of the other person," he says.

Rigid stances on issues, a mindset called agonism, can quietly poison personal bonds and communities alike. After a neighbor wrongly accused a family of running an illegal daycare because their adopted children looked different, the need for empathy and connection became clear. Finding even one shared value, like honoring someone’s chosen name, can transform division into understanding. Forgiveness and extravagant grace, as seen in the story of a mother pardoning her son’s killer in Iran, create space for healing and deeper relationships.