An idea permeates our modern view of relationships: that men and women have always paired off in sexually exclusive relationships. But before the dawn of agriculture, humans may actually have been quite promiscuous. Author Christopher Ryan walks us through the controversial evidence that human beings are sexual omnivores by nature, in hopes that a more nuanced understanding may put an end to discrimination, shame and the kind of unrealistic expectations that kill relationships.

Are we designed to be sexual omnivores?

Human beings evolved in small, egalitarian hunter-gatherer groups where sharing—including overlapping sexual relationships—was the norm. Before agriculture, sexuality helped build flexible social networks, challenging the modern idea of lifelong, sexually exclusive pair bonds. Evidence from anatomy, anthropology, and cultures worldwide reveals practices like partible paternity and sexual autonomy, with humans having sex about 1,000 times per birth, similar to bonobos and chimps. Misunderstanding these roots fuels shame and unrealistic expectations, while embracing them can foster empathy and acceptance.